Thursday, April 22, 2010

It's been a long time comin'...

Hello blogging, my how I've missed you. Remember me? I'm the chick that was going through a separation - followed by a divorce - followed by a "Praise the Lord, I am finally free!" and I have not looked back since. Ok, maybe I had one digression in where I thought I made a mistake, but then "said ex-husband" opened his mouth and I snapped back to reality.

I don't think I can decribe the feeling of the last year and a half. It's truly one of those things where you don't know how unhappy you are until you are completely out of the situation and reflect back on all you've been through.

There are many things I can and will blog about in the coming months - funny stories, house dilemas, work changes...but I'm going to start with the present day and work my way back. Work for you? Why am I asking? I'm gonna do it anyway, silly!

Yesterday someone I ADORE more than anything in this world (besides Piper), gave me this quote: "We come to love not by finding a perfect person, but by learning to see an imperfect person perfectly." Is that not the best quote ever? And it speaks to me on so many levels.

You remember in the beginning of a relationship where you are almost blinded by what is fairy tale and what is reality? The feeling you get when you meet someone and they are perfect in your eyes and can do no wrong? I used to be like that. Please note: I just said USED to be.

I think the older I get the more I am a realist. I know that people have their faults and every person on this earth is far from perfect. I am EXACTLY one of those people who are far from perfect. I'm grouchy in the morning, lose my patience a lot, am addicted to coffee and working out, and will never see the beauty in myself that other people say they see. I guess you could say I am my own worst critic.

I promised myself when I started my next relationship I would not do the things I did when I met and dated Mark. I think to some degree I put a lot of pressure on myself to only show the "perfect" side of me and not the "real - good, bad, and ugly" side of me. And to tell you the truth it got exhausting fast. But I always wondered, how can I truly be myself when I meet that person? I will want them to really like me before I bring out my annoying quirks.

And then that question was answered and something funny happened. I met someone (again) who already knew the good, the bad and the ugly. Someone ,who throughout the entire time I have know him, supported me. Someone who I look at as my soulmate, "The One". How freaking cheesy am I? I am that girl who is gushing over a man. A silly, wonderful man who loves me NO matter what. A man that for the past 20 years has loved me unconditionally on some sort of level - starting with friendship. A man that continued to be my friend even when I dumped him when I was 14. And you know how I broke up? Had my best friend Steph call to break up.

I mean, that's what you do it when you are 14, right? LOL...

For once in my life I am at peace. It was a long road and I never would have made it if I did not make the decision that I needed to be happy for me, not for anyone else. When I made that decision, my life changed for the better and then you came into and made it complete. Thank you.

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