Four Generations Collide - Heaven Help Us All

Last year when Piper was two, we took her trick or treating for the first time around our neighborhood. She was a princess, of course - aren't all little girls that? We explained to her that we were going to go knock on doors and say "Trick or Treat" and then people would give us CANDY! Now my daughter is a VERY smart girl, too smart for her own good, but she just could not process that people were going to give her candy.

So we went to the first door. She buried her head into the crease of my neck and would not say a word. So, I grabbed the candy, apologized and said "Thank you, this is her first Halloween." We went to two more houses and she did the same thing. When I was ready to throw in the towel, she surprised the crap out of me, got down and rang the doorbell. When the person answered the door, she yelled "Trick or Treat!" The really funny thing about it was when we would go to other houses and she would just see the door (it was not even open yet) she would yell "Trick or Treat!"

This year Piper is going to be a princess yet again. This theory makes me sick to my stomach - I am not a frilly girl, never have been, never will be. I prefer jeans and pants to dresses and skirts.
My mother will say to me ALL THE TIME, "But Michele, you have such nice legs! I gave you those legs! You need to show them off more!" My response to my loving mother is "You also gave me these boobs and hips. Do you want me to show those off too?" Why that woman does not find the humor in that, I will never know. BUT I do thank her often for my skinny ankles!

Thanks Mom! You're the best!

My parents have a condo in Branson, so Piper and I are headed there today. We are going to trick or treat around that area. There are houses there that, God willing, will have candy. And if those said houses do not have candy, Papa Ken better come up with a good back-up plan. You got that Kenny?

My Aunt Jackie and Uncle Whitey will be there, along with my cousin and her husband. I love these people. I love them for the obvious reasons - because they are family - but I love them more because they are mean, hateful and remind me of why I am apart of this family. My Aunt Jackie is my Mom's older sister. And I do not think there has been a family event where she has not called me a bitch. Who does that? My Aunt Jackie! If you were to look in the dictionary and look up the phrase "Doesn't give a shit" my Aunt Jackie's face would be right beside it. She is by nature a fun, but grouchy ol' woman - my Mom is fun, but a grouchy woman - I am hilarious (at least I would like to think so), but at times can be grouchy - and my beautiful three-year-old is funny and part of it is because she is a grouchy little girl at times.

We come from a long generation of grouches, it's who we are and I would not want to be any other way then this. I also think Piper will be just as content with this - after all, her favorite story for me to tell her at night is the one my Mom told her several weeks ago - "The grouchy girls' story". Thanks, Mom, for telling her that one. Now I have to tell it EVERY night!!

Happy Halloween people!